We are all on a schedule, the question is – whose schedule are you on?
I’m not trying to confuse you with this question so let me explain. We are all on a schedule in terms of priorities, actions, decisions and expectations.
This schedule could be a; spouses, employers, driven by your personal or career goals or God’s. Whoa there Tim, I thought these boosters were supposed to be self-help and motivationally grounded. They are – I’m just asking you to consider whether you are driven by human agendas or spirit ones. So, let me dig a bit deeper – stick with me if you are interested or curious.
Schedule defined – an outline description of the things somebody is to do and the times at which they are to be done. My definition – the inner and outer guidance system that determines your life direction and what its priorities are – moment by moment, day by day and year by year.
OK, so the concept of a schedule; its agenda, motivators, expectations, mindsets and outcomes.
Its agenda –
When driven by human schedules we often lose our direction because of wants, needs, desires and or what we believe we have earned or deserve. Ever been disappointed by the outcomes of your schedule? If you haven’t you are living in a cave. An agenda is simply a combination of expectations and how you plan or want to achieve them. We work, we plan, we hope but in the end things don’t always work out according to our agenda. This is life folks as I’m sure you have come to realize. I’m not implying that you shouldn’t have an agenda for life only that you need to be careful of attaching too much of yourself to it. Things change, people change, circumstances change and any or all of these can have a dramatic impact on your schedule/agenda.
Its motivators –
We all want something we don’t have. Some of these desires are noble while others can be very self-serving or selfish for any number of reasons but in the end all of our desires will one way or another express themselves through our behavior, choices and decisions. These are all motivated by something – the question is – are the motivators rational, mature or misguided in some way.
All motivation is inside-out caused by varied outside-in factors such as fear, envy, a service mindset, selfishness or a desire to have something or achieve something. I won’t bore you with the thousands of motivators but reduce them to two – a desire to serve or be served. Only you know what fills your heart when it comes to what motivates you to achieve, work, dream or want but in the end these motivators will drive most if not all of your attitudes and behavior,
Its expectations –
The number one cause of disappointment is unrealized expectations. Expectations are impartial, they don’t care how realistic they are, how valid they are or whether they actually come to pass. They are created by you based on a desire, need or want. When an expectation in an agenda is not grounded in a certain degree of reality or under your control you often have no right to actually expect what you expect. If this is true why do so many people set themselves up for these disappointments? Simple – they let their wants, needs, desires and expectations rule their inner mental world.
Not smart if you don’t want to continue to live with ongoing disappointment. Another factor is patience or should I say the lack of it. A lack of patience is a major contributor to stress and when your impatience takes over your world – beware – you are setting yourself up for just more disappointment.
Its mindsets –
A mindset is nothing more than a way of continuing to think about something or behave as a result of this thinking. Worry is a good example. Regret is another. Or, how about discouragement, despair or even anger. Or, how about bliss, joy, happiness, inner peace or contentment? All are just mindsets. So if your mindset is that you are in control of your agenda or schedule no matter what – guess what? You guessed it – more disappointment etc.
Its outcomes –
We all want favorable outcomes, results and circumstances but I’ll bet there isn’t one person reading this that has never experienced disappoint in some way either minor or big-time. We can’t always control outcomes but we can control activity. And yet even if we control our activities there is no guarantee that they will lead to our desired or expected outcomes. Been there? I have many times and I have finally come to realize that letting my schedule set me up of continued frustration and disappointment is no longer worth the energy, time or ego control.
My conclusion – I decided several months ago, took me a long time to finally realize that I am in control of so little in my life. Yes, I can control what I eat, how I work, how I play and how I treat others and many other areas but I am not in control of most things. Who is? Well for me I finally turned my schedule over to God. This doesn’t mean I sit around all day and pray, and wish and hope. The Quakers have a saying, “Pray but move your feet.”
Life is twofold. I take the steps He determines where they are headed and when and how I will get there and what many of the lessons will be along the way. You there yet? No problem, some day you will come to the same conclusion I have or you will continue to live with frustration, anxiety, stress and disappointment. Let me repeat – I don’t sit around all day and just ask Him for whatever and wait, but I do, do my best to observe signals from Him – some obvious and many not so obvious – some come as opportunities and some with a great deal of pain attached to them but in the end I decided His schedule was far better than mine.
“We have what we seek. It is there all the time and if we give it time, it will make itself known to us.”
Thomas Merton
In His Service, Tim