Weekly Relationship Tips
“Don’t look for the path far away, the path exists under our feet.”
~ Tung-Chan
Many people in relationships, and I would include myself in this category in my previous relationships, believe that the relationship that awaits them in the wings is better than the one they are in. Yes, there are destructive relationships. Yes, there are people who have made relationship mistakes, and yes, there are people who have poor judgment when it comes to selecting a life partner. But, in the long run, sooner or later you are either going to stay with someone you have chosen or spend your life alone. I don’t mean to imply that being alone is a bad thing. If that is what you choose for your lifestyle, then go for it. However, many people who are alone are not so out of choice, but due to a lack of commitment, indecision, insecurity, fickleness, etc.
One of the lines I often use in some of my keynote presentations is that if the grass seems greener across the street maybe it is because they are using better fertilizer!
No question about it, folks, the relationship guru’s tell us that relationships take lots of work. Some people would argue that many couples seem to have it really “together”, or seem to just really “fit”, or seem to really be “blissfully happy”. I am sure that thousands of couples fit any one of these definitions, as well as other positive ones. I will also bet that many who seem to have it “together” from outward appearances deal with the same issues, challenges and troubles facing the rest of us. No one gets to achieve success in any area of life – especially relationships – without a certain degree of: on-going attention, focused awareness, diligence, patience, effort and the ability to manage adversity.
So, my friends, here are a few ideas to consider the next time the grass looks greener somewhere else (with another person):
- Spend more time tending your own lawn than gazing upon your neighbor’s.
- Buy better fertilizer (invest time, energy and resources into your current lawn.)
- Recognize that wherever you look, you have to look through the same set of eyes (your own and that you will filter out what you don’t want and keep what you want as you gaze across the street.)
- Accept the fact that maybe your lawn may be dying – not because of your partner but because of your inattention.
- Have a plan to improve your lawn and implement it daily.